The Storyteller: Tales of Life and Music

“It dawned on me that maybe my guitar was the love of my life after all.”

After Grohl experienced his first breakup, he was sent down a teenage spiral of self-pity and hopelessness. However, it was not long before music put light back into his life. Grohl had a dream in which he was playing in front of a massive, sold-out crowd of adoring fans. He woke with a newfound drive to realize this dream. To this day, he finds that music keeps him going in both difficult times and uplifting times.

“This band, born from the heartbreak and tragedy of our broken past, was a celebration of love, and life, and the dedication to finding happiness in every next day. And now, more than ever, it represented healing and survival.”

For Grohl and his bandmates, the Foo Fighters represent the light, joy, and healing of power of music. With each song he writes, Grohl hopes to vindicate those who feel voiceless and misunderstood as he once felt. Grohl’s career was not an easy trek to fame, and along the way, he was almost shocked out of playing music forever when Kurt Cobain died. However, Grohl persevered through those dark times and arose to create new music based on the spirit of positivity and overcoming these life obstacles.

“I no longer considered music an unattainable act of wizardry, only possible for those who were blessed with the godlike ability of Jimi Hendrix or Paul McCartney. I now realized that all you needed was three chords, an open mind, and a microphone. And the passion and drive to make it happen yourself.”

When Grohl’s cousin introduced him to punk music, Grohl’s universe expanded and he was met with an entirely new list of artists to discover. On top of this, Grohl realized that musicians do not have to be the best at their craft, nor do they have to be liked by all; instead, all they needed was perseverance and motivation. The simplicity of punk music allowed Grohl to find his own niche and accept himself as a boisterous and chaotic musician.

“This was a feeling of freedom that I had waited for my entire life, and now that I’d been baptized by spit and sweat and broken glass, there was no turning back.”

Grohl’s first taste of freedom through music was at a Naked Raygun with his cousin. It was the first time he had heard live punk music, and he immediately immersed himself in the violent and frenzied mosh pit. The intimacy, passion, and chaos of the evening impacted Grohl for the rest of his life, shaping his musical style, the bands he joined and formed, and the person he became. This was one of the moments that change one’s life forever.

“I was more interested in why he played what he played. What was his intention? Why did his signature groove seem so much more natural than that of any other drummer, like the ocean tide, sometimes crashing against towering cliffs, other times gently lapping the shore? What was it about his feelings that spoke to me? And did I have a feel of my own?”

The drummer of Led Zeppelin, John Bonham, is one of Grohl’s key musical inspirations. Grohl believes that people inspire people and has dedicated much of his spiritual energy to John Bonham over his life. Grohl created a shrine for Bonham when he was 17, praying for musical success. He later got a tattoo of the John Bonham holy trinity symbol on his wrist. When Grohl listened to John Bonham drum, it affected him like no other music; he became deeply curious about what motivated Bonham and how he could develop his own unique style of music.

“From one ocean to the other, I had crossed the country on nothing more than the love of music and the will to survive. Surely, it could never get any better than this.”

As Grohl stood with his Scream bandmate on the shore, he felt as if he had finally made it in life and with music. Since he was young, he dreamed of touring the world, performing for adoring fans, and inspiring people the way he had once been inspired. He naïvely believed that this is the height of his career and his life, unaware of his future with Nirvana, the Foo Fighters, and creating a family.

“Every rehearsal began with a ‘noise jam’, which became a sort of improvisational exercise in dynamics, ultimately honing our collective instinct and making it so that song structure didn’t necessarily need to be verbally arranged; it would just happen, almost the way a flock of blackbirds gracefully ebbs and flows in a hypnotic wave over a country field in the winter.”

Playing with Nirvana was a unique experience that changed Grohl’s life forever. Grohl always had a haphazard and improvisational style of drumming, so he meshed well with Kurt and Krist’s equally unique and riveting styles. Together, the three of them created masterful songs that changed the entire course of music history, and Grohl describes this process as graceful and beautiful despite its chaotic lack of structure.

“Kurt envisioned a high school pep rally turned riot, burning down the gymnasium in a blissful mosh pit of disaffected teens, tattooed cheerleaders, and young punks, leaving their angst and frustration behind in a smoldering pit of rubble and ash.”

The instantly iconic video for “Smells Like Teen Spirit” was a vision of Kurt Cobain’s. Like Grohl, Kurt always felt like an outcast, misunderstood and ridiculed for being different from everyone else. Kurt expressed this in his music, style, and general way of being, and wanted to capture his own life experiences within the music video. Knowing that there were other disaffected youth much like himself, he aimed to illustrate the anger felt by those who are cast out by society.

“Music had always represented light and life to me.”

Music has been a defining force in Grohl’s life since he was young. It has helped him through countless difficult times and inspired him to be the person he is today. During Grohl’s time with Nirvana, music and fame were taken over by a sort of darkness that was not necessarily natural for Grohl. Although he deeply appreciates and fondly remembers his time with Nirvana, he realized after Kurt’s death that he preferred a more upbeat and uplifting style of music.

“Kurt was more than just a name to me; he was a friend, he was a father, he was a son, he was an artist, he was a human being, and over time he became the center of our universe, the point that our entire world orbited, but he was still just a young man with so much to look forward to.”

People inspire people, and some moments change a person’s life forever. For Grohl, Kurt Cobain was one of these people, and the moments he shared with Kurt over the short time they knew each other changed Grohl forever. Kurt was an inspiration for Grohl in many ways, including his love for his daughter, his passion for music and art, and his genuine humanity. Grohl regrets the loss of Kurt at such a young and pivotal age.

“But with friends, you design your own relationship, which in turn designs your grief, which can be felt even deeper when they are gone. Those can be roots that are much harder to pull.”

Grohl has experienced the loss of two important friends in his life: Jimmy Swanson, his lifelong best friend, and bandmate and close friend Kurt Cobain. Grohl explains that grieving for biological family members seems to be an ingrained process and one which the human body seems to somehow be prepared for; on the other hand, grieving for friends is uniquely challenging because the relationships that a person has with friends are of their own design and intention, and in losing these relationships, you lose a part of yourself.

“I found a term that the military used as a nickname for these unexplained glowing balls of light and thought it was just mysterious enough for me. Not only did it sound like a group of people, it almost sounded like a hang: Foo Fighters.”

Much of Grohl’s life has been accented by mysticism, including his John Bonham shrine, his experiences with ghosts, his visit to a psychic, and his dreams of UFOs. These dreams had an impact on Grohl as a child because although he did not necessarily see them as being real, they did seem to hold some significant meaning. When Grohl heard the term Foo Fighters, he knew that it was the perfect name for his new band—music inspired by light and mystery.

“This was a home. This was a family. This is what I wanted.”

When Grohl’s children were born, he knew that he finally had everything he had ever wanted in life: a career as a musician and a stable, loving family. Everything in Grohl’s life had begun to come full circle, and when he was finally ready to combine his dream of having a family with his passion for music—something he realized was possible after visiting Neil Young’s family—he passed forward the love and dependability that his own mother offered him to his daughters.

“The long journey from my childhood in Springfield, Virginia; to cutting my teeth as a musician in the Washington, DC, music scene; to performing in the White House for a Beatle and a president made this in every way the most full-circle moment of my life, but rather than get lost in complicated introspection, I just smiled.”

When Grohl was growing up, one of the first bands he loved was the Beatles. The Beatles showed Grohl the lighter side of music and how music could bring joy and comfort to anyone who listened to it. After decades of working his way up through the music industry, Grohl had a chance to perform for Paul McCartney, giving Grohl the opportunity to thank Paul for his years of inspirational music. In this way, Grohl completed the circle of gratitude for music in his life.

“I thought that life should take its natural course, a journey with no road map to refer to in the event that you get lost.”

Grohl went with his girlfriend to see a psychic. It is his girlfriend who wanted to go, and Grohl simply waited outside until she was done. When Grohl went to get her afterward, the psychic took his hands and explained that he had a powerful aura. She also asked him about his experiences with ghosts and UFOs. Grohl has dabbled in the mystical but has always believed in letting life take its course, never overplanning and always leaving room for spontaneity and surprises.

“Life is just too damn short to let someone else’s opinion steer the wheel.”

Grohl has always lived by the philosophy that being oneself is the key to success and happiness. He grew up admiring proudly unique and strange individuals, like rockstars, who were unafraid to show the world exactly who they are. Grohl aspired to be the same way, never shying away from a silly joke or a wild drum smash.

“I was exhausted—not physically, but my soul had just run a triathlon of emotion, nostalgia, and undying love of music. It’s hard to put into words the belief that I have in music. To me, it is god. A divine mystery in whose power I will forever hold an unconditional trust. And it is moments like these that cement my faith.”

When Grohl hosted a party for AC/DC and Paul McCartney, the night turned out to be a massive success. Grohl surprised his guests with a performance by the Preservation Hall Jazz Band, sending them all into a frenzy of dancing and gaiety. It is one of the most precious memories of Grohl’s musical life, as he was able to not only share the moment with his heroes but give them back a small piece of the happiness that he had given them over the years—because people inspire people.

“When the one-dimensional image becomes a living, breathing, three-dimensional human being, it fills your soul with reassurance that even our most cherished heroes are flesh and bone. I believe that people are inspired by people.”

People inspire people, and Grohl feels a surge of inspiration each time he has the privilege of meeting one of his heroes in the flesh. Grohl remains a humble appreciator and fan of the great musicians of his time, becoming nervous and flustered whenever he first meets them. Grohl’s first experience with meeting one of his heroes in the flesh was playing for Iggy Pop while he was still with Scream. Grohl explains that meeting one’s hero in real life has a lifelong effect on a person, allowing them to truly understand that the music that inspires them is created by ordinary, living people. These are the moments that change a person’s life forever.

“Why do these people mean so much to me? Because people inspire people, and over the years they have all become a part of my DNA. In some way, I have been shaped by each and every note I have heard them play. Memories have been painted in my mind with their voices as the frame.”

Grohl believes that people inspire people and uses his memoir to recount stories of all of the ways and times that people inspired him. Grohl explains his love and admiration for musicians, citing the fact that growing up listening to them, playing with and meeting them, has shaped the person he is today. When Grohl recalls a memory, it is always accompanied by the music that played when it happened. The people that inspired Grohl are now part of who he is, and the ultimate source of the music within the musician, as music is passed down, revisited, and newly appreciated by each generation that follows it.

“For, in a world full of Barbies, every girl needs a Joan Jett.”

One of the final chapters in Grohl’s memoir recounts the time that his daughters discovered Joan Jett in the form of a Barbie doll, and later had the privilege of meeting her when she came to their house to write music with Grohl. Grohl knows that the world is often a harsh place for girls and is grateful to women like Joan Jett, who show that being themselves and holding their ground is possible and empowering.

“I was once again filled with pride knowing that, no matter what, they could depend on me. I’ve got this.”

Grohl demonstrated his dependability as a father when he flew from Australia back to the United States and back again to Australia, all in a single day. When he found out that the annual daddy-daughter dance was to be held in the middle of the Australian segment of his tour, he bent the world to his will and managed to attend both. Grohl takes great pride in being a father and wants to ensure that he emulates his mother, not his own father, in his parenting.

“Courage is a defining factor in the life of any artist.”

Artists are people who honestly and openly bear their emotions for the world to see, opening themselves up to judgment, scrutiny, and hatred. Musicians are no exception, writing songs from the soul and then performing them on stage for hundreds or millions of people. Grohl saw courage in his daughter as she sang for the first time in front of her school, and Grohl’s climb from his days with Scream, to Nirvana, and through to the present required courage at every step along the way.

“Standing in the middle of it all was a little girl in a white hood and robe, her giant eyes full of sadness, perhaps a representation of the innocence Nirvana had lost with our traumatizing rise to fame. And now, here we were, reunited in a fitting room, pinning the cuffs of the pants that I’d be wearing while playing a Beatles song to a room full of movie stars. Irony much?”

When something in Grohl’s life comes full circle, he feels a sense of awe and gratitude for the moment. Grohl was invited to perform for the president and was styled by a woman he initially did not recognize. When she revealed that she was the girl from the “Heart-Shaped Box” music video decades before, Grohl saw the irony of the situation. The video, intended to be a criticism of fame and fortune, was a stark contrast to the situation Grohl found himself in, getting ready to perform at a high-profile political event.