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Grace is the protagonist and narrator of The Friendship War. Whenever she experiences a challenge, she comforts herself by relying on the scientific method, building theories about the world and coming to her own conclusions about how things work. As a result, she is constantly testing her surroundings and usually has “at least five or six active theories rolling around inside [her] head” (11). Grace’s character arc focuses on the journey she takes to find her courage. At the beginning of the book, Grace is quiet and rarely speaks up for herself, either because she doesn’t want to upset people or is embarrassed to draw attention to herself. As a result, her long-time relationship with Ellie is strained due to a combination of Grace’s quietness and Ellie’s domineering personality. Through the progression of the button fad, Grace realizes that Ellie hasn’t been a good friend. This realization makes her angry because she has done nothing to deserve Ellie’s poor treatment of her. Bolstered by the students’ rising obsession with finding and trading buttons, Grace finally stands up to Ellie, causing a feud that nearly tears the girls apart. Ultimately, however, Grace takes inspiration from her grandpa, using his own struggle with grief as a mirror for her struggle with anger. Watching him overcome his emotions makes her understand that she can’t let her own emotions rule how she thinks. At the end of the book, Grace still thinks scientifically, but she no longer tries to hide herself behind these thoughts. She acknowledges that emotions cannot be truly quantified and that sometimes things must be broken in order to be fixed, even though this concept makes no scientific sense.
Ellie is Grace’s long-time best friend and the antagonist of the novel; her domineering behavior demonstrates the inequality that can arise within the Power in Relationships. Grace’s earliest understanding of the distance between herself and Ellie comes in the acknowledgement that they have little in common. While Grace dislikes some of the things that Ellie likes, such as going to the mall and shopping, Ellie can sometimes be so fun that she “can make [Grace] happy to hang out at the mall all day, too” (15). This sentiment introduces the quality that is both Ellie’s best and worst asset—her magnetic nature. Ellie is charming and charismatic, and she uses these aspects to persuade people or to position herself at the center of group activities. Ellie also gets jealous easily because she likes being the center of attention, and this is shown by her efforts to place herself in the middle of the button trend right from the start. She does this because she wants herself, not Grace, to be seen as an important person within the button fad. Ellie’s jealousy is fueled by the ease with which she can win people over, which is what makes losing the pinwheel button such a big blow to her. When Grace tries to set things right, Ellie can’t see past her frustration at losing in the first place, so she destroys the button, both out of anger and out of a need to feel superior. When Grace is finally honest with Ellie and points out her superiority complex, Ellie is eventually able to see herself through Grace’s eyes and acknowledge the aspects of herself that are problematic. Ellie’s transformation at the end of the book speaks to the enduring power of friendship and to how people sometimes need someone else’s perspective to gain understanding.
Hank is Grace’s other friend and a foil for Ellie. Whereas Ellie causes Grace strife with her self-centered, jealous attitude, Hank is steady and self-assured and does not seek approval from anyone else. Hank has been at the periphery of Grace’s friend group for a while, and when she begins her feud with Ellie, he becomes a new constant in her life. Hank doesn’t think quite as scientifically as Grace, but he is smart and prefers to do his own research to learn as much as he can. Together, he and Grace symbolize the importance of spending time with those who have similar interests and temperaments, for the two friends help each other to feel validated and to develop self-confidence. Together, Hank and Ellie teach Grace that there isn’t just one kind of friendship. Grace ends the book being friends with both of them, even though those two friendships are very different.
Grace’s grandpa only appears a few times in the book, but he is an important influence on Grace’s character. The first chapter shows that Grace is completely comfortable spending time with her grandpa, and this chapter offers a contrast to Grace’s behavior when she returns to school. At school, she feels less comfortable, largely because of her strained relationship with Ellie. A big part of Grace’s relationship with her grandpa is represented by the idea that Nothing Lasts Forever, for both characters must navigate distressing changes and work to overcome strong emotions, whether of anger or grief. Together, Grace and her grandfather show how relationships are mirrors and how people help each other grow. Grandpa’s journey toward overcoming his grief is similar to Grace’s journey to overcome her anger with Ellie and herself. By the end of the book, Grace and her grandpa have moved past the emotions that have worn them down, but each still acknowledges that there is always more work to be done to keep relationships healthy.
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By Andrew Clements