35 pages • 1 hour read
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From a hospital bed, Rafiq reflects on Amar’s difficult birth and how relieved he was that the doctors got Amar breathing. Hadia comes into Rafiq’s hospital room, revealing that Rafiq is there for an MRI and sequence of tests based on some information Layla shared regarding Rafiq’s recent headaches, disorientation, and faulty balance. Rafiq reveals that he was persuaded to go to the hospital where Hadia works not so much for his own sake as for Layla’s, knowing she could stay with Hadia, Tariq, and their grandchildren (Abbas, age seven, and Tahira, age four). He reflects on how, because his grandchildren are not his children, his only obligation is to love them—and so he is loved by them in return. This sentiment contrasts with Rafiq’s reflections on Amar; Amar’s pains and disappointments always seem to make him retreat into misery, so Rafiq became harder in parenting his son.
Hadia and her colleague, Dr. Edwards, return with Rafiq’s MRI result—they have found a tumor, but it is operable. Rafiq then reflects that where the thought of his daughters working outside the home once disquieted him, he is now proud that Hadia is a doctor and Huda is a teacher. He knows that they will be fine and their families provided for, but he has no such assurance for Amar, and this saddens him profoundly.
Huda comes to see Rafiq in the hospital the day before his surgery, explaining that her husband, Jawad, stayed behind in Arizona for work. Tahira is there visiting at the same time as her aunt, and Rafiq notes how close the two are despite only seeing each other a few times a year. He reflects further on his grandson, Abbas, and how his childhood differs so greatly from Amar’s. Where Amar was beaten up and called a terrorist, Abbas has not experienced any such thing—and his parents refuse to shield him from such negativity in the world.
The night before his surgery, Rafiq leaves his hotel bed, seeking to take a walk, and is intercepted by a nurse. He explains he used to go for walks with his children, and she says that’s a wonderful memory for them to have, and that it’s those moments that Rafiq’s children will remember. However, Rafiq is not so confident; he feels he has failed at being a father because he doesn’t know where his son is, and neither do his wife and daughters.
After his surgery and release from the hospital, Rafiq continues to visit his grandchildren and bring them gifts. He buys a pair of shoes for Abbas, remembering the way he had intended to get Amar a pair up until he learned that Amar cheated on the spelling test, and Hadia asks him what good the gesture does now. Rafiq reflects on the fact that Abbas reminds him profoundly of Amar, in looks and in mannerisms, seriousness, and curiosity about the world. He notes that Abbas is the only person who asks about Amar, having seen him in old family photographs.
Back at home, Layla worries that Rafiq has resigned himself to the fact that he is dying, even though the surgery was successful. She scolds him for not eating and not taking his medication. Rafiq continues to reflect on past events, particularly how both of his parents died while he was still a teenager, and how worried he was for Amar when Abbas Ali died. Rafiq’s views are now more lenient than the narrative previously indicated, including what he believes God will forgive.
During another conversation with Hadia, Rafiq learns that Hadia wasn’t telling the truth when she said her family has heard no word from Amar in recent years. She tells her father that, starting when Abbas was about five, Abbas began receiving phone calls from an unspecified individual who asked him lots of conversational questions about the family and treated him like a friend. Hadia is almost certain that the occasional caller is Amar. Armed with this knowledge, Rafiq asks a favor of Abbas one night as he’s tucking him into bed. He says that if Abbas ever gets another call from his secret friend, that he should pass along a message from Rafiq. Rafiq’s message to Amar is an invitation for reconciliation if Amar should ever wish—with emphasis on the fact that even if Amar and Rafiq do not reconcile in this life, there’s always the next.
This closing stretch further emphasizes intergenerational links, namely how parents’ upbringings inform their parenting of and interactions with their children, as well as the role that regrets play in hindsight. Rafiq reveals why he was so hard on Amar, but he also reveals the concern and fear for his son that lay beneath each instance of anger. He also reveals actions he took that the narrative had never previously revealed—as this final section of the novel is the first and only time the reader is ever privy to his point of view (in fact, this section is written in first person, whereas the rest of the novel’s various character perspectives have been in third-person limited). Rather than employing a device, such as the unreliable narrator, Mirza limits reader access to the most crucial character viewpoint until the very end of the novel.
This section focuses on Rafiq, as it is told in his first-person perspective. No other section of the novel is told in first person, and no other section of the novel is devoted to just one character’s viewpoint. In many respects, it is fitting that Rafiq has an entire section to himself; up until this point, we have had no insight into his point of view and have only seen his actions and character through the lens of other characters’ perceptions of him. Rafiq reflects on what matters most to him in his old age and illness—listening to his wife and daughters, who are concerned for his health; spending time with his grandchildren; and hoping that Amar will come home before his death.
The settings in this ending stretch seem smaller than ever. Most of the action takes place in Rafiq’s hospital room, in his daughters’ homes, or in his own home and back garden. Arguably, most of it takes place inside Rafiq’s head, given his numerous reflections; the first-person narrative style is borderline claustrophobic at times, enhancing the emotional intensity required of the plot at this stage. Rafiq longs to reconnect with his son but accepts that he may not have the chance now that his days are numbered. His transformed beliefs are intimately tied to his hopes for reconciliation with Amar and make for a moving conclusion.
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